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This is going to be a strange non-weather post, just to warn you. Every few months I have a weird dream that is so bizarre and funny that I literally wake up laughing out loud, and at the same time shaking my head wondering how my own brain is capable of these Jack Handey/Mitch Hedberg-esque bits. I really wish I could come up with this stuff when I was awake, I could write a book! I started writing the dreams down a couple of years ago so I wouldn't forget any, and with the latest one on Saturday night (the break-in dream) I thought I had a good collection to post.
So, here's the 'weird dream list', compiled over the past 3 years. These are actual dreams, I'm not making any of these up (well I guess technically I am, in my sleep). I'd love to see a dream analyst try to tackle these.
- I dreamed I had a bag of strange hard candy that when you ate one, it made you talk with an Australian accent.
- I had a dream that I got two dogs, and I named them both the same name - so I could call one, and they would both come.
- I had a dream that I went to Long John Silver's and got a two-piece chicken plank meal. The cashier set my tray down on the counter too hard, and one of the hush puppies fell out and rolled across the counter in front of me. I was paying with a credit card, and when I went to sign the receipt, I accidentally signed the hush puppy instead.
- I had a dream that I worked for a recording studio, and one of the artists coming in to do an album was an Italian gangster rapper named "Big Boyardee".
- I dreamed someone broke into my house, and the only thing they stole was a Q-tip!
- I had a dream that I took a date to a bowling alley. The air was really dry inside, and my lips were getting chapped. I was embarrassed and I looked everywhere for some chap-stick, but couldn't find any. Finally I found one stick, but it was inside one of those "Skill Crane" arcade games. I spent about 5 dollars in quarters trying to get the chap-stick with the crane, but it was too small to grab onto, and I kept dropping it.
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